My Pondering's on Friendship

(in no specific order)

Do you find friendship perplexing at times and then other times it comes so naturally it's like breathing?
I sure do.

I am going to let my friends down and they are going to let me down.  But this does not need to mean the end of a beautiful thing.

Or maybe it does.
Circumstance dictates this I suppose.
The good ones operate with grace at it's heart.
That's what I think.


I don't believe in fighting with friends.
I don't see the point.
I fight with Jon, my parents, my sister and 
occasionally Jon's parents!
I'll fight you if you push me, but 99 times out of 100,
I won't start a fight with a friend.
If you do something that I react to in anger, 
I evaluate what it was that angered me, 
is it something I can move past from, 
if it's so outrageous that I can't get past it, 
I'm probably not friends with you anymore.
Friends are friends.
Friends are not spouses and they are not family.
They fill a different role in my life.
And I don't think this is a complete thought.
It feels like it has gaps in logic to me.
I will continue to sort this one out.


When I am extroverted, I am a very different friend from when I am introverted.  So if you met me in a extroverted phase of life, 
I might be very confusing to you these days.
Sorry about that, it's truly nothing personal.


I like my introverted self better than my extroverted self.
I am more at peace with who I am.
I'm not running from myself.
And I hope this makes me a better friend.
I wore extroverted-ness as a type of armour.
It kept me safe in battle but now, the battle is over.
Time to take it off and see the real me.
Flitting around groups used to be fun but now I find groups really hard.  I don't know where I fit.  It takes great effort.
One on one is my sweet spot.
Pop-in's are my favourite.


Not to my credit, 
I have to easily put friends on pedestals.
What they have said about me has mattered more than what 
Jesus says about me or what I know about me.
To many times I have given friends authority in my life that I should have never given.


It struck me this week that you can give your heart to your friends in Godly ways and un-Godly ways.
Sorrow has always followed when un-Godly ties are made.
What I mean by that is when what a person says matter's more than what Jesus says.

(I found this printable while making a gift for one of my 
dearest friends.)

You can get it here


It occurred to me that for some friendships, 
I will never be a safe place.  At first this saddened me but the more I think about it, the more I am ok with this thought.
There are many friends I have in my life that I truly love with all my friend-heart, but they might not be safe for me in regards to certain struggles or sorrows.
It does not reflect poorly on them or me.
We can't be everything for everybody!
I feel very liberated!

 This season of formulating my own beliefs vs ones I have taken on but have not owned, has been hard work.
The topic of friendship has come up often in my emails, conversations, prayers and thoughts.
They have been some of my most cherished emails 
and conversations I have ever had.  
For my dearest ones, I know where I stand and 
this means so much to me.

I found this here once upon a time.... I think